Mindfulness Mode
 

Mindfulness Mode

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Increase your calm, focus and happiness so you can be more relaxed, contented and satisfied with your life. For business, entrepreneurs, educators, parents. Hosted by Bruce Langford.

Episodes

303 Be A Truth-Digger To Share Your Story; Dawn Gluskin

Mar 11, 2018

Mar 11, 2018

28 min

Dawn Gluskin is a storyteller, copywriter, and a truth-digger. She helps entrepreneurs tell their stories that need to be heard in the world. She's been in sales & marketing for over 20 years & grew her first business to 7-figures at age 30. She stands for full self-expression & vulnerability as the means to a well-lived life & thriving business.

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Most Influential Person

  • Felix Lopez, a healer I met in Colorado.

Effect on Emotions

  • Mindfulness is just about being aware. In the past I just tried to stuff it down if I didn't want to feel it. Like, I don't want to feel this so I'll just pretend it's not here or I'll just be happy.
  • It's really about feeling it. I'm feeling into what are you trying to tell me, sadness or anger or whatever it is.

Thoughts on Breathing

  • Focusing on breath is a really great way to bring you present, you know, just slow inhales and exhales. Instantly, you're right back in the moment.

Suggested Resources

Bullying Story

  • I never really was bullied. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones. I was quiet and shy as a kid and so I think I stayed off people's radar.
  • When you said that, there was something that came to mind with my daughter who is is ten. She's a very sensitive soul. She's like, an old soul; very sensitive.
  • I first realized this when she was four, we went to the Vet because my dog had eaten something he wasn't supposed to eat. And we're in sitting at the Vet's and she's like, Mommy, I don't feel good in my stomach. And I was like, oh, did you eat something? And she's like, no, animals are hurt here, animals have died here.
  • I thought, where did that come from. But I just realized she's really in tune with people and she's mindful of people's energy. And so how that shows up for her sometimes is in her relationship with her friends.
  • There was a particular girl who's a very sweet girl, but if she didn't get her way, she would always say to my daughter, I'm not going to be your friend anymore. She would leave and she would leave my daughter in tears just from being so sensitive.
  • A lot of well-meaning family members would say to her, you need to toughen up. It's a tough world out there, you need to be tougher.
  • I took a different approach. I said to her, no, you're perfect and complete just as you are. Your sensitivity is actually a gift and sometimes it might not feel like that, but it is a gift to the world.
  • And I think how you eliminate the bully is by building up the individual so you can be mindful of who you are and just embrace even the parts that are difficult; the parts that you might feel weird about sometimes.
  • I taught her no, that's who you are and you don't need to change. The world needs to change. I really empowered her around it. And then we even worked through it with her friend and you know, everything is all beautiful. It was a beautiful lesson for both of them, even for the friend was like, well, she's just expressing how she feels. She doesn't know how to express that in another way and it's not about you. She's not trying to hurt you. That's about her. So it was a good lesson for both of them.

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302 Realize Your Clients’ Lingo with Photographer, Jeffrey Shaw

Mar 7, 2018

Mar 7, 2018

38 min

Jeffrey Shaw is one of the most well-known portrait photographers in the United States - His portraits have appeared on Oprah and People magazine as well as hundreds of other publications. Jeffrey is also host of the successful business podcast called Creative Warriors. Mindfulness plays a key role in Jeffrey’s world. He realizes making powerful connections with people is about embracing and understanding their LINGO, their specific secret language.Using this insight, Jeffrey teaches entrepreneurs how to attract their ideal customers by learning to speak the proper LINGO.

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Most Influential Person

  • K.S. Iyengar of Iyengar Yoga

Effect on Emotions

  • Mindfulness has affected my emotions by giving me greater stability.
  • We're very emotional beings and as a creative person, that's probably even more exaggerated.
  • So mindfulness has created curiosity, which creates a stability of mind.

Thoughts on Breathing

  • Breathing is very much a part of my mindfulness practice. In Yoga we refer to it as Pranayama.
  • I have three kids and are adults now, but when one of my daughters was young, she had a really bad toothache and I taught her to breathe through the toothache.
  • I had double hernias. I chose to have surgery done separately without anesthesia because I convinced the doctor. I didn't want to go through the general anesthesia. So we did them separately and I breathed through those surgeries. He didn't think it could be done and I was like, I can do it. So breathing has been a big part of my life.

Suggested Resources

  • Book: Going To Pieces Without Falling Apart by Mark Epstein
  • App: N/A

Bullying Story

  • I was bullied most of my childhood, to be honest with you. Through middle school were really, really tough years for me.
  • When I was growing up we had seventh and eighth grade in middle school and I spent most of those two years the guidance counselor office because I wouldn't go to the cafeteria.
  • I went from class to the guidance counselor office to avoid the bullies. I was bullied on the bus. I was a shy, withdrawn kid; very sensitive. I was not as tough as the other boys.
  • Yeah, most certainly I was bullied.I think the sensitivity that I carried with me was the mindfulness. There was no way I ever could have taken the advice I see given in tv shows about bullying.
  • On sitcoms somebody's always advising the person being bullied to stand up to the bully. There is no way that was ever going to happen for me. So the mindfulness for me, was I was very aware that I was being bullied, but I was very mindful that that person had a problem.
  • And I actually think it's the mindfulness that helped me survive it. And I've gone to counselors and therapy and all the time I spent in the guidance counselor's office was to be with a therapist and that was often pointed out to me.
  • I honestly never really took on the victim role. I was being victimized, but I looked at it from the perspective that the person doing the bullying has an issue. I'm OK. I always carried with me a certain amount of self awareness and self confidence despite the fact that I was shy, I was actually inwardly quite confident and I was confident that the issue is not mine. I was very mindful that the issue was with the bully. Yeah, I mean it just was never. I never could have taken the advice.
  • I had two older brothers and a father there was the typical sibling interaction. My older brothers were constantly picking on me and bullying me and the advice to me was to toughen up. My parents would just say, toughen up, which to this day never made sense to me. I thought, why should I toughen up? Why are you telling the person being bullied to toughen up, to meet that person as opposed to telling the bully to knock it off.
  • But again, being mindful of the situation, I think it was just the easier route. A lot of times parents knowingly or not, just choose the easier route.
  • It was easier to tell me to toughen up than it was ever to tell older brothers to take it easy on your little brother because they were tougher. There was more resistance. I was the path of least resistance.
  • So oddly enough, I was very mindful of this dynamic. Even as a very young kid, I was very mindful that this was the dynamic which allowed me to hold on to a significant amount of self-worth and confidence that it was like, I'm OK, I don't know what's wrong with these people, but I'm OK and I'll just wait until I can find my right place in the world.
  • And when I do, I'll be able to shine.

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301 Live Your Purpose With Author Leah Weiss

Mar 4, 2018

Mar 4, 2018

38 min

Leah Weiss, PhD. is a Stanford Business School professor. She is a corporate consultant and has worked with LinkedIn, Google, and The Omidyar Group. She is also a Harper Collins author and a public speaker, having done talks on TEDx, Intuit, Google, and LinkedIn. Leah is an expert in corporate mindfulness, compassion, and purpose. Her most recent book is "How We Work: Live Your Purpose, Reclaim Your Sanity, and Embrace the Daily Grind".

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Most Influential Person

Effect on Emotions

  • I know them [my emotions] better and I recognize I'm in my body better. I don't always make better real time choices, but I do more often. If I slip up and react in a way that is not aligned with my values, then I can more quickly get to a good outcome.

Thoughts on Breathing

  • Many times through the day, breathing is my quick anchor.
  • I notice physical sensations I'm experiencing and just breathing and noticing the patterns of the breaths.
  • Sometimes I'll fall into holding my breath. I bring awareness to that and remind myself to breathe more deeply.
  • Breath is an amazing, very convenient tool we have our whole life.

Suggested Resources

Bullying Story

  • I've definitely experienced bullying. I had a person that I worked for who had a very erratic management style and was part time on the work that I was working on full time. It was really challenging.
  • When it is a good person with a good heart ... but there were a lot of situations where I felt like, as a young working mother early in my career, our conversations felt like interrogations. They were often like a one-on-one check-in that could've been an opportunity to problem solve and debrief and to get his wisdom and experience.
  • I felt like I was like going into a boxing match. The topic was related to compassion research. This stuff is hard to bring into the nitty gritty, which is why I wrote this book. I feel for him, I didn't enjoy it at all at the time. It was awful and really kind of traumatizing over time, like I just was eaten alive by that job. So it was never enough and I could never be prepared.
  • He was really smart and kind of sniffed out if I prepared it 'A' through 'Y' then definitely 'Z' would be the thing that would get picked up to dig into and kind of pick at. And it was challenging.
  • I had to make some decisions about how I wanted to live my life and whether this was a job that I wanted to go forward in. And I tried to have direct conversations one on one about my experience of our dynamic.
  • I tried bringing in HR to have a third person to try to help round out the perspective. Ultimately I didn't stay there full time. I went to a different organization. I did keep collaborating with that person. I don't feel like it was a bad person.
  • It was just like someone told me a long time ago that we can have compassion for almost anybody, but we have to figure out the right distance to have it from. Maybe working for someone 40 hours a week isn't a distance I can have compassion for, but interacting once a year at an event and working on projects that we both care about but not directly, that works.
  • It was a fine line and I had to do a lot of decision-making myself about what my values were and where my sort of line in the sand was. Did I want to be a spokesperson about this issue? Because I kinda suspected the next person would come in and have the same experience. You know, there's a lot of considerations to be made when we're in these kinds of situations.

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300 Shape a Miracle Mindset With JJ Virgin

Feb 28, 2018

Feb 28, 2018

34 min

JJ Virgin is a Celebrity nutrition and fitness expert. She teaches clients how to eliminate food and carb intolerances so they can transform their health and their lives. As co-host of TLC’s Freaky Eaters and health expert on Dr. Phil, JJ is a prominent TV and media personality, including appearances on PBS, Dr. Oz, Rachael Ray, Access Hollywood, and the TODAY Show. JJ is the author of four NY Times bestselling books: The Virgin Diet, The Virgin Diet Cookbook, JJ Virgin’s Sugar Impact Diet, and JJ Virgin’s Sugar Impact Diet Cookbook. Her latest book, Miracle Mindset: A Mother, Her Son, and Life's Hardest Lessons, shows warrior moms how to be strong, positive leaders for their families, while exploring the inspirational lessons JJ learned as she fought for her own son’s life. JJ also hosts the popular JJ Virgin Lifestyle Show podcast.

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Most Influential Person

  • Kay Smith, my first mentor.

Effect on Emotions

  • The way mindfulness has helped my emotions is, I tend to be very ... I'm a quick start in the Colby. I'm a red on the color code personality. I'm very reactive, very quick to move and being mindful allows me to take a breath and not over-react.

Thoughts on Breathing

  • Breathing is something I've got to work on, Bruce. I was just doing a podcast interview yesterday with the gal who told me about a new App and I said, I need to get that one. Either that or I've got to get my butt into yoga. Something to be a reminder.

Suggested Resources

Bullying Story

  • Bullying obviously has a whole spectrum, right? The outright obvious, like, when I was in elementary school, we had a bully that I shut down who was bullying one of my girlfriends. I just stepped. I was always the tall kid. I'm six feet tall and she was a little five foot tall Japanese Gal and this kid was bullying her.
  • I just stepped in front and was like, go ahead, hit her. Like you'll have to get through me first, which shut it all down.
  • So there's the obvious bully, but I think even more dangerous is that kind of bully who is emotionally bullying or bullying by telling you the way it's going to be.
  • When my son was the victim of a hit and run, our first doctor at the first hospital was a bully. He was the head of the trauma center there. Now this was in palm springs, so they're used to having seventy and eighty year old people come in.
  • And if my son was 80 years old and came in, in that condition, there's no way he would've made it. But my son was 16 and he stopped and literally looked at us and said, your son is not going to make it through the night. He needs to have another surgery. But he'd never survive the airlift. Even if he did, he wouldn't survive the surgery. And even if he did, he'd be so brain damaged, it wouldn't be worth it .You have to let him go. I call that a bully.
  • My 15 year old son stood right up to this guy and said, yeah, so point two five percent chance he'd make it. And that's when the doctor said that sounds about right. And my son said, so we'll take those odds. And I looked at that doctor. I go, you're overruled. You need to get the paperwork going.

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299 Have Compassion For Yourself Explains Tanja Diamond

Feb 26, 2018

Feb 26, 2018

37 min

Tanja Diamond is a Tantra Master and Coach extraordinaire. She’s the creator of the High Speed Evolution Coaching Program. Tanja and her coaching team are dedicated to getting people unstuck in life, love, and money. Tanja is also known for her expertise inthe area of Tantra, sex, teens, and parenting and has garnered over 18,000 hours of coaching and consulting time over the past 30 years. Tanja has been called the “Coaches' coach”.

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Most Influential Person

  • My Tantra Master.

Effect on Emotions

  • Well, emotions aren't something that can be controlled, but mindfulness controls my behavior after I have an emotional response.

Thoughts on Breathing

  • A breath work practice is critical and the foundation of mindfulness. Without it you're not being mindful.

Suggested Resources

Bullying Story

  • Wow, do I have a bullying story for you. At 10 years old, I was living in Africa and all of a sudden I came down with this weird patch on my elbow.
  • And so the first thought everybody had was leprosy. So you know, my parents were freaked out. Leprosy is a really nasty thing. It's not a good thing at all.
  • And it ends up I had psoriasis. What happened was it ended up taking over about eighty percent of my body. And so kids used to always make bets like I'll give you a buck if you touch her.
  • I would sit at a desk and this one girl used to disinfect her desk when I was done, even though the teacher had said it's not contagious.
  • And so it was totally ugly. I mean, I'm big just gnarly. It looked like I was burned and it was really bad. It was bad in the beginning. And so I got bullied about that. I was also two years younger. I was twelve when I went into ninth grade and so I was younger and smaller.
  • These girls set me up, actually the cool people set me up for a bad, bad fall. They put little notes in my locker, like it was from a secret admirer. And so I'm reading these notes and I think this boy likes me, you know, I'm kind of like, oh my gosh, you know.
  • And it escalates over the next couple of weeks to. It's like, oh yeah, meet me in the Commons area. Right.
  • And at first I was thinking this can't be true. Like I'm Geeky, kind of like, you know, like hideous looking, you know, when my sweet tender heart shows up there in the commons and I'm sitting there waiting and you know, I'm sure I was bright red. I'm shuffling my feet, I'm super nervous.
  • And then all of a sudden this whole group of people start laughing.
  • And I'm standing there and they're like saying like, really? You thought somebody could like you? So that was it, but I've been bullied by parents because of my psoriasis.
  • I was like, at a swimming pool. This one woman was like, you need to get out of the pool, you can't swim here. And I said, this is not contagious with psoriasis. And she's like, you know, you need to get out.
  • She started escalating, making her voice really loud. So I've had that happen over the years and I would say that my way through it was actually I kind of fell into a kind of a mindfulness mode.
  • I decided one day that this was somebody else's problem, like I wasn't going to allow somebody else's opinion or feeling or whatever influence what I was. Because all I wore was long sleeves and you know, like I hid all the time. I chucked them all.
  • Then I wore shorts, put on a tank top and said, so be it. I kind of walked out into the sun and it's like, I'll just deal with it, right.

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298 Get Present Before Donning Your Hustler Cape; Eric Allred

Feb 21, 2018

Feb 21, 2018

33 min

Eric Allred is an entrepreneur who began his working life in the corporate world as a tech consultant. That lasted eleven months and then he began his entrepreneurial journey; at first partnering with a friend. They grew a company from $500 thousand to over $3,000,000 in sales in less than two years. Later he worked with a men's clothing company and then a media holdings company, which he's currently building with a partner. Eric has been immersed in digital marketing work and he also took over as CEO for an e-juice and CBD oil company. CBD oil is derived from the hemp plant which is part of the cannabis family and is now being used by thousands of people to relieve symptoms from all kinds of ailments. Eric has recently been touring the United States as part of the CBD oil project.

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Most Influential Person

  • My coach.

Effect on Emotions

  • Mindfulness has allowed me to realize that I can be a conduit to my emotions. I don't have to be my emotions.
  • There's some that kind of go through me and I'm like the vessel for them, but I don't necessarily need them to hamper or impede me.

Thoughts on Breathing

  • I take time almost every day and stop and breathe. It's my way of bringing myself back to equanimity as my way of creating like a groundedness for myself.

Suggested Resources

Bullying Story

  • I think really as I've gotten more aware, you realize just how much it effects you and impacts you. A lot of your behaviors and structures that sit on top of your essence and your identity.
  • I can remember junior year of high school, AP chemistry, second class, second seat front left, Mr Bankey's class.
  • This girl Amanda said her biceps were bigger than me, in AP chem. I went on to put on like 30 pounds that following year, I just like, lifted, lifted, lifted, lifted, lifted.
  • That took me into college where my significance was how I wanted to be received from girls, as a potential hookup, so to speak.
  • I was always the friend of a friend and I was funny and I was an older soul and that just kind of pushed me over the edge. But then I just wanted to drink and hook up with girls and it really, really, impacted me and how I show up for the feminine.
  • That turned into getting into business in the marketplace. I was like, 'Well I need to become financially successful. So they like me for my wealth and I'm powerful, I'm significant, I'm seen.'
  • It starts just like a relationship where you need something from them all the time. People can feel that.
  • To that was an instance, like we're being bullied. Being mindful of it and really seeing how it impacted me didn't all come at once. It was just kind of shedding, shedding layers of it. It was huge for me.

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297 Overcoming Domestic Violence With Mindfulness; Rosie Aiello

Feb 18, 2018

Feb 18, 2018

35 min

Rosie Aiello engineered an international escape from domestic abuse after a 25 year marriage to save her daughter and herself from ongoing terror and cruelty. Nearly mentally destroyed, she reinvented herself since arriving back in the United States, started her own business, and became a speaker, best-selling author and an international awarding-winning entrepreneur. Rosie and her daughter are now sharing their powerful story of escape, healing, and freedom in their upcoming memoir called 11 Hours to Freedom. Rosie helps women regain their voice and confidence, and rebuild their life so that they can create a joyful and prosperous life that they deserve.

Contact Info

Website: elevenhourstofreedom.com

Free Gift: elevenhourstofreedom.com/gift

Most Influential Person

Wanda Whitaker

Effect on Emotions

It helps me get centered and not fly off when I want to fly off, because trauma survivors have a tendency to go and fly off. We get into panic hypervigilance and things like that.

So it's key, and one of the things that I have on my wall that I have to keep reminding myself of, is that being fearful and afraid is not the same thing as being in danger. You have to kind of live life by that.

Thoughts on Breathing

As I've learned about this, I introduce it to all my coaching. Breathing is an integral part of it.

I have to be reminded as well to breathe in slowly through my nose and go really slow on the exhalation to just slow everything down.

It's key. Absolutely key to calming the whole nervous center, calming the fight and the flight and the freeze that we can get into so easily. It's just critical.

Suggested Resources

Book: Finding Life Beyond Trauma: Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to Heal from Post-Traumatic Stress and Trauma-Related Problems by Victoria Follette PhD and Jacqueline Pistorello

App: Timer App

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296 The Feng Shui of Mindfulness; Paula Brown

Feb 14, 2018

Feb 14, 2018

34 min

Paula Brown is an artist and animal healer, possessing a profound ability to communicate with animals as a telepathic communicator. She has also worked extensively as an international award-winning branding expert. Paula is a practitioner of Black Hat Feng Shui which is the type of Feng Shui most common in North America. Paula is also accomplished in Qi Gong, Hawaiian Shamanism, Flower Essence and dowsing methodologies. She is the author of “Fur Shui. An Introduction to Animal Feng Shui.”

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Most Influential Person

  • My fifth grade teacher, Mr. Boyd. He looked like Paul Newman. I had a crush on him and I was painfully shy.

Effect on Emotions

  • Mindfulness has gotten me to be more grounded. I'm always accused of being way out in the future and with my Huna practices it has brought me into the present moment and it's allowed me to stay in the present moment and expect the best, trust myself and be in the present moment.

Thoughts on Breathing

  • Huna again. There is a thing called Piko Piko breathing and it's an attention awareness up and down from the crown of your head to your navel. Whenever I get stressed out, I just revert to Piko Piko breathing. You don't have to breathe deep or anything. It's a very invisible thing so I can do it any time and any place and it brings me back into the present moment and it brings me calm. Yes, breathing is very important. Piko means center in Hawaian. It means navel. When you breathe in you bring your awareness to the crown of your head, not your breath but your awareness. When you breathe out you bring your awareness to the center of your navel. You do that three times and it's amazing. Your whole body relaxes and when you're relaxed you're you. When you're tense you're not. So Piko Piko brings you that relaxation.

Suggested Resources

Bullying Story

  • I have many bullying stories because I was such an odd child. I was never part of the 'in' crowd but I was always very interesting so people would reach out to me.  I was one of the smartest ones too, so people would copy from me. That was my strength.
  • In business, I was bullied a lot, being the only female VP or creative director at the time in these large advertising agencies. I had to be escorted to enter the Algonquin Club in Boston by the chief of BBDNO and the Vice President because I went in the front door alone and various men stood up and grabbed me and walked me out and told me I was nothing and that I shouldn't be there.
  • I was verbally and physically shoved out of the room and then told to go through the servants entrance. Then I couldn't even go there because I wasn't a man. And so I had to be escorted and I'll tell you that left some pretty indelible feelings about how women were treated and how I was treated and it made me more resolve to be more outspoken about us as women being worthwhile.
  • Literally, you're stripped of your worth when something like that happens. The words and the physicalness; the words were very damaging. So I look at bullying as the words and also the physical aspect of it but mostly words.

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295 The Joy Of Intimacy and Mindfulness With Rabbi Manis Friedman

Feb 11, 2018

Feb 11, 2018

49 min

Rabbi Manis Friedman is a world-renowned author, counselor, lecturer and philosopher. Rabbi Friedman uses ancient wisdom and modern wit as he captivates audiences around the country and the world. Over 150,000 copies of his provocative yet entertaining tapes have been sold.

Rabbi Friedman’s first book, Doesn’t Anyone Blush Anymore? published by Harper San Francisco in 1990, was widely praised and is currently in its fourth printing. Rabbi Friedman is a noted Biblical scholar, recognized for his sagacious grasp of Jewish mysticism and a professionally ranked member of the National Speakers Association. Rabbi Friedman has recently released a new book titled The Joy of Intimacy.

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Most Influential Person

  • Professor Dr. Hugblokuv, University of Western Ontario, London, Canada.

Effect on Emotions

  • Emotions are a direct outgrowth of your intelligence. The way you think is the way you feel.  The way you understand is the way you emote.
  • If you have a very quick mind, you're going to have very high energy emotions. You're going to be quick in your emotional responses just as your mind is quick in the pickup. If you're slow and thorough in your thinking, your emotions will also be a little more sluggish, a little more patient, a little more thorough.
  • If you get a lot of pleasure from learning, from understanding, from using your mind, you will have more pleasure in your emotions. So it's a direct relection of what's going on in the brain.
  • That's why if you want to improve your emotions, don't sit there trying to change your heart, change the input in your brain and you'll get a different output in the heart.

Thoughts on Breathing

  • I find if you don't breathe it's hard to think. The brain needs oxygen.

Suggested Resources

 

What Does Mindfulness Mean To You?

  • I think mindfulness is really synonymous with life itself. If you're not mindful, you're not living; you're just existing or surviving. You haven't been hit by a truck so you're still here. But that's not called living.
  • Mindfulness is not an option, it's not like you can live without it or you can live with it. It's synonymous with life. If you want to be alive, start paying attention.We're very enamoured with the quality of our existence. We want to exist well and we forget to live.
  • We have a very comfortable existence compared to our grandparents and to other countries and other places around the world. We do have very comfortable, very nice existence. But the amount of effort we put into it and the amount of concern and anxiety over it just drains us of life.
  • It is the very successful who are most likely to get depressed because; what is it all for. As long as you're still trying  to improve your existence, you're kind of distracted. Once your existence is good, it's like, now what. What was it all for?
  • The other problem with focusing on your existence is that two people, both focusing on their existence, cannot get along. It's just not possible. They certainly can't bond. Because when you're focusing on your existence, it takes you into yourself and away from others. You become introverted in some way.
  • In order to connect to another person, the only part of you that is flexible enough to thrive on the presence of another person, is if you're both focused on living because life is flexible. Existence is rigid. It's got too many rules. You've got to have this house, that car, it's just too rigid and it carries over into your personality.
  • Even success as a person is too materialistic. Too much of that existing.
  • For example, people will be surprised and shocked to hear this. If you're determined to be a good husband, you're going to have an unhappy wife. If you're determined to be a good mother, you're going to have an unhappy child, because if you're trying to be good at something, you're too busy with yourself.

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294 Digital Self Mastery With Dr. Heidi Forbes Oste

Feb 7, 2018

Feb 7, 2018

29 min

Dr. Forbes Öste is a behavioral scientist & best-selling author. She teaches people how Mindfulness and Technology are connected and she has devoted years to doing scholarly research in the human relationship with technology. Dr. Forbes Öste is a consultant in the field of Social Strategy. In addition to all this, she has a passion for the topic of wellbeing. Dr. Forbes Öste founded the movement for Digital Self Mastery to support the transition into the digital era without losing humanity in the process.

 

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Most Influential Person

  • My Grandmother

Effect on Emotions

  • Mindfulness enables me to be more stable. About five years ago we were still living in Sweden. We now live in California.
  • I had season affective disorder that became progressively worse every year. It can result in very deep depression and it was on the extreme.
  • I came to California for some meetings and felt normal because it was sunny every day and I was outside. I was with friends who were doing yoga everyday.
  • They had a mindfulness practice of their own in that way. Just being part of that after being deep in a depression that had lasted several years, I was brought out enough in order to get that prospective look at what was going on.
  • I saw that chemical response that was happening in my system. I knew that something needed to change. Not being able to get that awareness and prospective is where you get stuck without mindfulness.

Thoughts on Breathing

  • It's yogic breathing if anything. I used to teach yoga and I that type of breathing comes most naturally to me.

Suggested Resources

Bullying Story

  • I can give you a current story because I had an interesting experience just last week while I was speaking at a conference in Warsaw. It was a tech conference.
  • My presentation was more of a story-telling thing. This was not a typical tech talk; instead I was telling people you need to be grateful for technology. This does not necessarily resonate with everyone.
  • Later in the day I talked more about the research and the science behind it and the neurological implications. While I was speaking, somebody tweeted a nasty, trolling comment that was like, 'that was the most boring presentation, what does that have to do with tech ....'. I was raised that if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.
  • Anyway, it was unnecessary. I went back into the green room after my talk and I was looking at some of the comments and I saw that and my heart kind of sank. I thought, that wasn't a very nice thing to say.
  • There were two or three people sitting around me when I read it and they said, 'that's awful'.
  • Actually, the response was that they tweeted replies to the comment saying, that's so wrong, it was amazing. It was just this beautiful moment of support and wonderfulness.
  • What I found from my own awareness of that response was that instead of it ruining my day, my response was; 'that's a shame', and, 'she must have been having a bad day.' I took a moment to breathe and I thought, 'that's really sad'. I felt sorry for her more than for me.

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